Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for January, 2008

I get emails from this lady who helps you get your house in order, and also to help you get your kids motivated to clean.  This is one I recieved, and I thought it was cute. 

JOB DESCRIPTION :Long term, team players needed, for challenging, permanent work in an often chaotic environment.  Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work  variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call.  Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities! Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.  RESPONSIBILITIES :

For the rest of your life you must:

  • Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5.
  • Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the  backyard are not someone just crying wolf.
  • Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers.
  • Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects.
  • Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks.
  • Must be a willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next.
  • Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices.
  • Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
  • Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product.

Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.  POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION :None. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you.

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE:

None required unfortunately.
On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION:
Get this! You pay them!  Offering frequent raises and bonuses.  A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent.  When you die, you give them whatever is left.  The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS:

While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth, unconditional love, and free hugs and kisses for life if you play your cards right.

PARENTS in appreciation for everything you do on a daily basis, please know that you are appreciated for the fabulous job you do.

** THERE IS NO RETIREMENT  – EVER!

Boy, ain’t that the truth!!!

Advertisements

Read Full Post »

Last week the FDA approved  beef, pork, and dairy from cloned animals.  They say it is the same as eating meat from non cloned meat.  So, my question is, why?  Some say that cloning leaves the animals genetically altered.  Hormones and antibiotics are already linked to an array of health risk, cancer comes to mind.  What the HELL is wrong with people.  I mean is there really a shortage of non cloned meat?  The answer, it seems is no!  Does this freak anyone else out?

Read more about this story here.

Read Full Post »

I was watching this commercial with my boy’s, and they laughed so hard I thought they were gonna fall off the chair.  Even after watching for the umpteenth time! 

ENJOY!

Apparently kickin’ a bear in the crotch is hysterical to 7 and 10 yr. old boys!

Read Full Post »

Tonight I am sitting in my nice warm house.  My tummy is full.  I can go to bed tonight without fear.  I won’t be fear-full of men coming into my house and killing my husband.  I won’t be fearful of rebel soldiers kidnapping my son’s, and brainwashing them into being killers.  I won’t be fearful that my 12 yr. old daughter will be taken and used as a sex slave.  I won’t be fearful that my children will have to watch as I am raped.  I won’t be fearful that if I vote for the “wrong” presidential candidate that I will have my hands chopped off, or that my house will be burned by my neighbors, or that my family and I will try to find safety in a church only to have it set on fire.  No, tonight I will sleep in a comfortable bed. 

Tomorrow my children will  complain that they have to get up and go to school, school that I don’t have to worry about how it will be paid for.  Tomorrow my husband will go to work, secure in the knowledge that he will get enough pay to feed his family.  Tomorrow I will go to the store, and be able to buy enough food so that my family will have full belly’s. 

In Uganda, there are thousands of boys who leave their homes at night to sleep in safe places.  Why?  Boys as young as six and seven are being snatched from their villages.  They are watching friends murdered, being brainwashed and forced to become soldier’s for the rebels in a 20 year war.   There are hundreds of thousands of people displaced by the government.  They were forced to leave their homes and live in displacement camps.  A thousand people die every week in one of these camps.  There are children left to survive on their own because both parents are dead.

This is just Uganda.  There are 54 countries in Africa!  So, what can a mom in Idaho do?  I must admit I feel helpless and hopeless.  But I can no longer be silent, I must find my voice, and use it however I can.  I have read about Kenya this week on the blogs.  Last night my husband and I watched a documentary about blood diamonds, and the civil war in the 90’s in Sierra Leone.  Today at church we watched two video’s from Invisible Children about children in Uganda.  God is speaking, asking me what am I willing to do?  My mind is swirling, and my heart is heavy.  Baby steps, I think I have to make baby steps.  Our family will sit down this week and decide what we can do to make a difference.  Will we give up things we don’t need?  Can my children give up birthday gifts, and give instead?  Can I decide to live in simplicity?  Time will tell, but I have to try.  Faces are burned in my mind, and I can’t pretend I don’t know the truth.  My 10 yr. old son summed it up well.  After watching the stories of the two kids, Sunday and Grace, from Invisible Children, he said “I feel guilty, I wish I had never seen that”.  Yes, it is easier when we don’t know the truth, but we can’t pretend any more.  We know the truth.  Are these the orphans and widows we are commanded to take care of.  There are children suffering and I must give them a voice! 

I would encourage to read Sonja, Cindy Bryan and Bill Kinnon’s posts about Kenya.  Here are some other links for you to check out.  One CampaignInvisible Children.  We all have a voice to make a change, will you use yours?

Read Full Post »

Church in ordinary life

One of the things I love about the way we have chosen to do church is that it is not limited to “going” to church on Sunday.  Recently, a couple in our church had an anniversary.  The husband was running open mike night at the very cool Rembrandt’s coffee house, and so our church went there to help his wife surprise him with a beautiful new guitar.  We laughed, sang, ate and cheered as our friend got a great anniversary gift.  In the midst of the celebration, we took communion.  It was really a beautiful moment.

Sunday, we decided to have a family fun day.  We went bowling, and then to dinner.  I think for me, these times are in some ways more important than what we do normally.  We have been criticized for not having a weekly study, or studying the Bible more, BUT, we are learning to love and prefer one another.  As I watched the interaction of everyone, I was really moved.  Helping each other, sharing food, cheering others on.  It was a very Spiritual moment.  We are learning to be community.  We are also learning to love.  To me that is much more important than another damn Bible study, I mean really, how many more damn Bible studies do we need?  I love what Rickard says.  When we can love the Lord our God with all our heart, and with all our soul, and with all our strength, and with all our mind; and our neighbor as ourself, then we will move on.  To that I say Amen!

Read Full Post »

So, why is the U.S. government doing nothing about this?  I have often wondered why it seems the U.S.  turns a blind eye to the atrocities that are going on in Africa.  And it’s not just this administration either, it’s been going on for a very long time!!!!!  It is an outrage!  THIS PISSES ME OFF TO NO END!  I guess a nation that does not have a plethora of oil doesn’t need our “attention”. 

Read Full Post »